The Power of the Mortar and Pestle

There are family members we never get to meet, those whose absences are filled by the memories of the people who knew them. I never met my great-grandmother Osunfunke Thomas (nee Olatunji), but I’ve formed an image of her from the story of her passing, as told to me by my mother and her sisters.…

Instant Pot Recipes and Wisdom

When I first wrote about Instant Pots back in 2017, it was with the ardor of new love. I’d fallen hard for my first electric pressure cooker, delighting in the myriad ways it could improve my kitchen life. All those weeknight meals of dried beans and silky braised meats, the speedy brown rice, the endless…

Two Wrongs Don’t Make Mr. Right

Sitting in bed after his five-year planning exercise, I asked him what traumas he was working through. Despite being the daughter of a social worker, or perhaps because of it, I still haven’t learned how to gently ask that question, or rather I still haven’t learned how to not ask it. “I’m actually doing really…

Why Is Everyone Else Quitting?

Send questions about the office, money, careers and work-life balance to workfriend@nytimes.com. Include your name and location, or a request to remain anonymous. Letters may be edited. Making a Midwest Move My partner and I are considering a move to Ohio because of the lower cost of living and the opportunity to have a good…

What to Do With All Those Apples

I went apple picking last weekend, along with about a million other people in the New York metro area. Is it me, or does recreational apple picking just continue to surge year over year as a fall activity? Some people are not into it, which I get, and yes, cynically speaking, it’s an excellent flannel-clad…