It’s the talk of every group text — at least every group text composed of women over 40.
Miranda July’s latest novel, “All Fours,” is about a 45-year-old woman who upends her seemingly settled domestic life by checking into a motel a half-hour from her house for a few weeks, taking up with a younger married man and then experimenting with an open marriage.
On her journey to self-discovery — and sexual awakening — she asks women she knows to share with her their true desires: Are they happy in their marriages? And if they’re not, are they going to do anything about it? What are the other possible arrangements for a life?
In a sort of whisper network, women who have read “All Fours” are taking a page out of the main character’s playbook and posing these same questions to one another, opening up about their hidden fantasies and frustrations.
“I’ve been talking about it more days than not with my friends,” said Caitlin Delohery, 43, a writer and content consultant who lives in Portland, Ore. “We’ve been texting about it, and we’ve met for coffee and drinks to talk about it.”
Ms. Delohery, who identifies as queer and is raising a 13-year-old with her partner, said the book had resonated strongly with her friends who are in long-term relationships.
“I’ve been in my relationship for 10 years, and my friends have been partnered in similar ways,” she said. “We don’t want to escape our relationships, but what I saw in Miranda’s book is less about literally escaping monogamy and more about creating space within it to have differentiated experiences — a way of living with a partner where you are not defined by this sort of codependent, mind-meld partnership.”
