The ceremony was led by David Raynal, a spiritual adviser to Mr. Irvin, who was certified by the state of Rhode Island as an officiant for the affair. He recited two readings, one old and one new, chosen by the couple: a Native American poem about the interconnectivity of the earth and a piece that Mr. Mendieta wrote himself.
“What I really like is that they put together a wedding that was so reflective of them,” Mr. Raynal said. “They give us hope that we don’t have to be put in these boxes and be with a certain person. You can just be in love with someone, and it doesn’t have to be a certain way.”
Each groom was accompanied down the aisle by family members and a string quartet. “That was my favorite part,” said Antonio Mendieta, 72, Mr. Mendieta’s father who lives in Kissimmee, Fla. “We came down these really big stairs together and I got to tell my son that I really like Whit, and I am very happy they are getting married.”
Amber Mark, the Grammy-nominated R&B singer and songwriter who is a friend of the couple, performed the first few songs at the reception, including each of the groom’s first dance with his mother.
Another highlight was the cake. A local baker made it from a recipe that belonged to Mr. Irvin’s great-great grandmother. “She got the recipe from the Waldorf, and it stayed in the family long before it was made public,” Mr. Irvin said. “It was kind of difficult because there is a food coloring in it that doesn’t exist anymore.” The cake was cut by a cake cutter that Mr. Mendieta’s grandmother had used for her wedding in 1944.
The last two songs of the evening, played by a D.J., tied the theme together, Mr. Mendieta said. “Our second to last song was ‘One More Time’ by Daft Punk, and it ended up being so good, because it’s a long song, like five minutes, and people were going crazy for it,” he said. “Then we played Frank Sinatra’s ‘My Way,’ which is an ode to the fact that everything we do, we do it our way.”
