The victims of stalkers experience inconvenience in everyday life, which can later develop into serious psychological problems, but recognizing the pursuer, at first sight, is not so easy. Invasion of personal space, importunity, harassment – we are talking about the main markers that you have a stalker.
Intrusive communication
Obsession is the first manifestation of stalking. In most cases, it is confused with the usual manifestations of attention. Frequent SMS, calls, messages on social networks at first bring joy, but if they come from an unfamiliar or unpleasant person, and he does not respond to your direct requests to stop communication, this can already be considered stalking that requires a reaction.
Unhealthy curiosity
There is nothing alarming in the fact that the interlocutor is interested in your tastes in food or your profession. However, constant questions about the little things (which bus route you take to work when you have a lunch break, in which store you buy groceries) indicate the desire of the interlocutor to control your actions.
Too much awareness
If a fan knows facts about you that you personally did not tell him, this should also alert you. The stalker can spend hours looking for even the most unimportant information about the object of adoration, get in touch with mutual friends or even colleagues, carefully analyze photos and geotags to find out everything about his victim.
Unexpected meetings
If you know the guy in person and accidentally met him at a party of mutual friends or in a park near the house, there is nothing strange in this. But if there are no common ties, affairs or hobbies with a person, and such “random” meetings are repeated too often, this means that the stalker has studied your schedule well and now has the opportunity to pursue you, hiding behind a random coincidence.
Frequent gifts
The stalker wants to be close to the victim at all times. If he doesn’t have the ability to do it physically, he will do it mentally. One way is to constantly give gifts and thus remind of himself. If gifts from fans come regularly, ask them to do it less often. A real stalker will ignore this request and continue the psychological abuse.
Persistent attempts to meet
If a fan offers you to meet in person after correspondence, you have the right to refuse. An adequate man can repeat his request several times, but, having received a refusal again, he will stop trying. The stalker, in response to a refusal, will continue to pester the victim, or may even appear at the most unexpected moment at home or at work.
Annoying care
Caring is common to close people, but when it becomes suffocatingly intrusive, this indicates an unhealthy development of relationships. Constant control over what and how much you eat and drink, how many hours you spend at work or on a walk in cold weather, is another attempt to gain total control over your life and a sign of moral abuse.
How to get rid of a stalker?
If you are convinced that your fan is a stalker, try every possible way to stop communicating with him – you should not try to explain anything to the pursuer, since such behavior will only provoke him. Change the privacy settings of your social media accounts (preferably all at once) and blacklist his phone number.
If the stalker knows where you work or rest, change your usual routes. Try to visit other shops, cafes, places of recreation. If possible, move around the city accompanied by friends or relatives – the stalker will not want to approach you if you are not alone.
Tell your loved ones about your suspicions. If you feel it necessary, contact the police.