Dr. Roopa Kohli-Seth, a surgeon who lives on the Upper East Side of Manhattan, noticed that something was off at one of her 12-year-old daughter’s swim meets last year: She wasn’t lifting her arms out of the water.
“A boy on her swim team had meanly told her that she shouldn’t swim so hard and lift her arms up because everyone could see her underarm hair,” she said. “I realized then that the hair was a serious issue for her and that she should have it removed.”
Her daughter became one of a rising number of preteens turning to professionals for hair removal.
Owners of laser hair removal centers, dermatologists and salons that offer waxing and laser treatments report seeing an increasing number of clients as young as 8 and into the early teens.
Dr. Kohli-Seth took her daughter to Romeo & Juliette Laser Hair Removal in Manhattan for laser treatments. Sessions for her underarms came first, followed by ones for the hair in between her eyebrows and her upper lip. Last summer, she started sessions to get rid of the hair on her arms and legs.
“I had concerns about her doing this because she is so young, but she has a new sense of confidence now and smiles a lot more,” Dr. Kohli-Seth said. “The hair is pretty much gone for good, and it was worth it.”
While it was once a given that the middle-school years would be an awkward stage, today’s preteens have grown up in the age of Instagram, always on camera, and they are hyper-aware of their grooming.
Romeo & Juliette’s founder, Christian Karavolas, who opened the laser center in 2002, said that 8- to 14-year-old girls now make up almost 10 percent of his business. “Five years ago, hardly any came in,” he said. They tend to have their upper lip, underarms and arms lasered, he said. Some do their legs, too, while a few treat their bikini lines.
Dorothy Wilk, the owner of Dorothy’s Day Spa on the Upper East Side, said that she has many 10- and 11-year-old girls who come in regularly for upper lip, eyebrow, arm and underarm waxing. She has been open for 40 years and said that waxing for this age group has never been more popular. “We used to get the occasional teenager five or eight years ago, but they’re coming in younger and more frequently today,” she said.
Wax Candy, with three locations in the Los Angeles area, has seen an increase in young girls, too. “I would say that 10 percent of our clients are 13 or younger, whereas a couple of years ago they were barely a blip,” said Jen Cook, a co-owner.
Dr. Amy Wechsler, a dermatologist on the Upper East Side who does laser hair removal, said that it’s a commonly booked service in her practice with preteen girls.
This phenomenon is the opposite of the movement among millennial women, who often embrace their body hair, sometimes dyeing the hair on their underarms, according to Olivia Guinaugh, a home and personal care analyst at the research firm Mintel. In a 2018 survey, the company found that 25 percent of women between the ages of 18 and 34 agreed that it was acceptable to have visible underarm hair, compared with 5 percent of women who were 55 or older. “The millennial generation is all about female empowerment and embracing #MeToo, and being O.K. with body hair is part of that,” Ms. Guinaugh said.
Emeral Eden, 25, an Atlanta resident who posts videos about body positivity on her YouTube channel, dyes her underarm hair in bold colors such as green and pink. She was hairy during elementary school, she said, and was bullied relentlessly because of it. “I used to get called werewolf and shaved my underarms every day until I realized that I couldn’t change myself to please others,” she said. “If it’s not your body hair, people will find something else to pick on.”
Not everyone sees it that way. Wendy Nash, a child psychiatrist at the Child Mind Institute in New York, said that she and her colleagues frequently work with prepubescent girls who are bothered by their body hair and have been mocked because of it, either at school or by their siblings. She also has appointments with parents who are conflicted about taking their young daughters to have their hair lasered or waxed.
“It’s a topic that’s coming up with younger and younger girls, partly because of the rise of social media and partly because puberty is happening earlier,” she said. “It’s not unusual today for an 8-year-old girl to have arm hair.”
Dr. Wechsler said that young girls who have had laser treatments tend to view themselves in a more positive light. “Facial hair can negatively impact their lives, and it improves their self-esteem to have it taken off,” she said.
That was the case for Lily Levin, 16, who lives in Marietta, Ga. When she turned 14, she noticed that the dark hairs on her chin, the sides of her face and her upper lip were visible against her pale skin. Although she hadn’t been teased about it, she fretted that she would become a target. Lily asked her mother, Ilene, if she could have it removed. She didn’t think twice about saying yes.
“Like Lily, I had visible facial hair at her age and used to get called monkey lady,” Ms. Levin said. “Back then, there wasn’t a culture of young girls getting hair taken off so I dealt with it, but I wanted to spare Lily the same pain.”
But Dr. Shari Lipner, a dermatologist at Weill Cornell Medicine and NewYork-Presbyterian Hospital, warned that children have to be able to tolerate the pain of lasering and sit still during the treatment. “The procedure can be painful, but a topical numbing cream can help,” she said.
Dr. Kohli-Seth said that her daughter never complained about the pain, while Lily said that it was uncomfortable but “not horrible.”
At least it’s fast, noted Mr. Karavolas, of Romeo & Juliette. “We do the lip in one minute, underarms in three minutes and arms in 10 minutes,” he said.
It’s important to go to a properly trained technician. “The setting has to take into account the person’s skin tone and how much sun exposure they’ve had,” Dr. Wechsler said. If done by someone who is not properly trained in laser hair removal, the treatment could cause burns and permanent scarring, she said.
Cost may also be a factor. Monthly waxing sessions, depending on the salon and body parts getting waxed, can run $100. Lasering is significantly pricier, but it can remove hair permanently in about six sessions. Dr. Wechsler charges $200 and up for a single session, and at Romeo & Juliette, a package of six sessions for the upper lip, along with six follow-ups to laser any leftover hairs, is $450.
For parents who don’t want to or can’t pay for laser or waxing, Dr. Wechsler said that a topical hair removing cream, such as Nair, is an easy and affordable alternative. And of course, shaving is an affordable option.
Whatever method they opt for, Dr. Nash emphasized that the initiation of hair removal should come from children, not their parents. “Don’t broach the topic with your daughter if her body hair is bothering you,” she said. “The most important thing is for her to feel good about herself, regardless of body hair.”