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I was dizzy; my heart, pounding. It was September 2013 and I was seated in a basement classroom at the University of Michigan in Ann Arbor. I had taken a year off to study filmmaking and my first voice-over class was about to begin. The professor handed me an American Express ad. Then it dawned on me. I would have to read it. Aloud. In front of everyone.
As a longtime writer for The Times, I had always composed in silence. The prospect of performing sent me reeling. “Whom should I sound like?” I thought to myself. “Maybe I could be Morgan Freeman. He voiced ads. He was the voice of God in ‘Bruce Almighty.’ I CAN be Morgan Freeman!”
No surprise, I sounded nothing like him. (More like Lauren Bacall, I’ve been told.) But I muddled my way through and, after class, my teacher gave me a sympathetic hug. Still, something was gnawing at me. I needed to find my voice, both literally and metaphorically.
And so I began a yearslong effort to push myself out of my comfort zone. Since then, I’ve held a weekly salon for friends, taught classes on the creative self, and put together an arts and ideas gathering called “The Box Sessions,” which will be held in February 2020 near Santa Cruz, Calif., and will explore creativity, community and the power of story.
What I’ve found over the years is this: We are all creative, even if we don’t think we are. The challenge is to figure out how to tap into our creativity. We are the stories we tell ourselves — narratives that are either limited or expansive, depending on our self-perception. And the next point is key: Everyone needs a community.
As an award-winning writer who covered Hollywood and Silicon Valley and profiled prominent figures like David Geffen, Brad Pitt and Donald Trump Jr., I honed my expertise by observing and listening to my subjects. I was witness to their aspirations and foibles, spending weeks absorbed in their lives. Now I could examine my own.
The Box Sessions took shape last year. I found a collaborator — 1440 Multiversity, an education center in the redwoods outside Santa Cruz — and tackled my new role like a reporter would, seeking out masters in their fields and organizing workshops that delved into major issues. Like fear.
Why fear? Fear of failure is what deters most people from trying anything new, especially as they get older and the stakes seem higher. People want permission to flop and not be judged by their peers. I took a tap dance class and am a most enthusiastic amateur. As artists and writers know, a creative life takes courage.
Exercising my own creative voice made me want to help others learn to exercise theirs. Producing The Box Sessions, in the end, was a lot like writing. I had to tell my story with flair. I got better with practice. And like a reporter with a new beat, I embraced the uncomfortable role of novice. People like Jon M. Chu, the director of “Crazy Rich Asians,” and the Emmy-winning producer Nina Jacobson were happy to help. In seeking to start a community for others, I am creating one of my own.
As I think back on that first voice-over class six years ago, I realize I didn’t need to find my voice after all. I was searching for another way to express what was already there.
And here’s an interesting twist: In May, a Times colleague asked me to record some voice-overs. I jumped at the opportunity.
I didn’t have to channel Morgan Freeman anymore. I could be myself.
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