When you meet a charming charismatic man, it’s hard to resist his charm. The problem is that such people can use their irresistibility to manipulate others. It’s a pity that they do not have an inscription on their chest saying “I’ll ruin your life.” Well, even if they did, it would hardly be a warning because they look very attentive and sincere!
Narcissistic people can be extremely welcoming and charming in the first stages of communication. At some point, the seduction regime is turned off, and you are puzzled what has brought you to such an arrogant and indecent type. To notice the difference between someone who really wants to please you and those who need it to manipulate other people, it is important to know these dangerous habits that seem sweet.
1. He imitates your gestures
One of the factors that there is a mutual attraction between people is that they start imitating each other’s movements. As a rule, this is not very noticeable to them because it happens unconsciously. The manipulator will focus on this feature to get your trust and create a connection. If you reach out for the same thing simultaneously or say a word at the same moment, he will smile and comment on how similar you are. When you notice that this is happening, it’s better to distance yourself and ask yourself if there really is so much in common between you, or he wants you to think so.
2. He uses a hypnotic look
Eye contact is a great way to show a person that he/she is important to you. If you feel somebody’s concentrated look, you should know that the manipulator wants to check the boundaries of what is allowed. He can also say something uncomfortable or frank in order to observe your reaction. Try to weaken the eye contact when it becomes too intense. You do not have to withstand these visual attacks, so you can turn away at any time or focus your attention on something else.
3. He playfully violates the boundaries
The goal of a charming manipulator is to attract attention, win your admiration and gain power over you as soon as possible. To test his abilities, he can make subtle attempts to disrupt your personal space. He can touch you as though accidentally, hug at the time of greeting, or sit down a little closer than you need. If it makes you uncomfortable, tell him directly. This will show that his tricks do not work, and you are not ready to tolerate an invasion of your territory.
4. He sounds revealing
Charming people know how to talk beautifully and convincingly. They know how to engage you in a conversation. A narcissistic person will make you feel trusted and special. When you get used to this attitude and constant attention, he can suddenly distance himself. You will feel that you lack his communication and will try to return his benevolent attitude, thereby handing him the tool of manipulation.
5. He makes a lot of compliments
When a person is infinitely courteous, this should always be alarming. Especially if you feel that many compliments are not so fair when you are concerned. Pleasant words sound lovely, they destroy your vigilance, and this is exactly what the manipulator needs. It is important to understand this person’s motivation: to emphasize dignity and win your heart or to use you for his mercantile goals.
Manipulators can be even more skillful. They make a compliment involving your friends and acquaintances. Hoping that you will learn about his kind words, the manipulator praises you behind your back. It looks very natural, and such a delicate game can be difficult to recognize. Hearing so much flattering, you lose vigilance and do not think this is a game. In fact, we treat other people better, if we find out that they like us.
6. He takes care to manipulate you
It’s easy to disguise manipulation under care because it’s difficult to react negatively to such attention. Phrases like “I understand you perfectly well”, “I know what’s better for you”, “Be sure to accept my help, I’m doing it for your benefit”is the manipulator’s attempt to impose his ideas and desires on you. In this case, it is very important to be able to refuse politely, but firmly. There is nothing wrong about not accepting help if you don’t need it.
Do not look for manipulation when there’s none
Just like not every man you meet has good intentions, not every charming person wants to use you. Having succumbed to another person’s charm, it is important to remember about people’s real intentions and to stay reasonable. Trust your intuition as it can recognize the trick.
