See if you are guilty of them too! We all know how unstable relationships can be – everything comes along fine and then topples suddenly when we least expect it because of some reason that we were wont to play down. Almost mechanically one partner lays the blame on the other’s door, although we all know that both of them are usually at fault.
Naturally, tempers flare up, the heartaches, control is slipping – and there you are right in the middle of the blunder you know you shouldn’t have made. Which one is your favorite?
Coming down on your partner
You have grievances to thrash out – that’s all right, but as soon as you begin to cast aspersions on your partner’s character, you move the fight into a foul area where both will lose and no-one will get any satisfaction.
Avoiding a serious conversation
You have issues cropping up, but you two never sit down to discuss them – confronting your partner seems rather frightening, you may think you stick your neck out, and leading this kind of conversation requires certain firmness, but once it’s done, it can clear the atmosphere.
Overcoming the barriers
People who live together can be pulled apart by their different lives, and the bond weakens upon them. It needs tightening, so don’t forget to plan quality time and special events to draw you closer to each other.
Chalking up points
There can be some competition between you, but once you’re up to your ears in argument, you would do well to check it. When both of you are trying to prove your superiority over the other, you won’t be getting anywhere. Discussions are for better collaborating, not for winning.
Venting your anger
Of course, you can do that. But if you want to have a happy life together, bear in mind that your ratio of interactions should be five positive to one negative. So if you can’t help but shout your partner down, do it after you have had five pleasant episodes!
